Susie C's and Susie D's Bonfire Night Diary
Oh my gawd 6.55 am, dark and freezing Glasgow, so sleepy we were oblivious to one million pound customs raid on the Barras. £999,999 worth of Berkleys, Superkings and Lambert & Butler fags up in smoke - The crew will be gutted!!
More bad news - man with burgundy hair claiming to be our promoter - who the fuck is he? Where’s Colin Mac, Eat to the Beat heart throb!
Well first things first must fix hair and make up, quick french shower and off to work!
Susie C and her throbbing finger set to work on building a kitchen whilst Susie D had the pleasure of Asda Parkhead (cheap as fuck, fab).
On return to the Barras I could hear a Mallard seemingly accompanying Susie C around the kitchen, when asked about her new found feathered friend she replied beans on toast! Erik eat your heart out!
Knocked out lunch and dinner by 12.15pm just in time for the arrival of the country club (backline and posh swag).
Five in a row, tough going so decided to go shopping in town centre - Susie C bought shit loads - trainers, coat, undies - hungry work all this shopping - off to the Gandolfi for lunch - oh the life of a caterer. 3.15 pm better return to work.
Pretty uneventful dinner out by doors 7 pm enabling us to retire to penthouse suite to watch fireworks at Glasgow Green, unfortunately most of crowd also watching after Susie C told Alfie (support band), “Barras, best gig in Britain - floor will be mobbed you’ll love it!” she lies like a rug!
Returned to kitchen to find steaming local crewman eating out of dustbin - so pissed didn’t realise he was eating Quorn not Chicken Pie! Brilliant!
And this is where our day ends as we have become seriously boring lightweights and must get as much sleep as poss. Even Ian the band bus driver kindly cleans the dressing room for us - maybe he thinks we need our beauty sleep!! He’s right.
P.S. How many promoters reps does it take to rep a show?
Scotland 4, England 1.
Des Hill, Drum Tech's Diary for The Barras.
"An Irie Day"
Phone goes, it’s Gor “Hello Des, are you still in your bunk?” Yes I replied. “Well get the fuck up and get in to the gig you Sassanach!”. Gor seems to be right at home in Glasgow. Oh well I’ll tell you all a little tale I made up in my sleep. Now this tour is on a bigger scale than the usual Embrace tour, therefore we have much more equipment, for example front of house looks like a fucking space ship or as I like to call it fantasy island. This is a strange but real place often seen at many larger venues around Britain and the world. On fantasy island there lives Flight Lieutenant Milky who is only on the island after crash landing his Spitfire there many years ago during the war. Now Flight Lieutenant Milky lives on the lower plateau protected by a large steel fence to keep the large expanse of punter ocean out of his domain. But be warned also upon the same island lives a much feared tribe old sailors call Abbiss, or known to all drumtechs as Fire and Ice. From his higher plateau cut off from the rest of the world eating his own feet for sustenance which unfortunately causes rank breath. Also from his stinking plateau he has a strange and sadistic power to either freeze or burn you. Luckily for Milky, not affecting him. Milky only has to put up with it for an hour an a half a day. Anyway I might dream up some other bizarre but possibly real shit next time watch this space. Anyway back to the day, being it a totally Irie and Righteous Day on getting up bumping into Beever cleaning his large front and may I say sharp teeth on a log. Went into the gig and set up, sat down for some breakfast and in walks TM Fat Bloke, Gary Robinson dribbling from the right hand side of his gob. Finding this unusual as he normally dribbles from both side of his mouth I laugh so does he and Gor and Beever. I would laugh at almost anything today after all it’s an Irie Day, mmmmnnnnn. Later on, sit here on my drum stool writing this coffee strong and the ting soundcheck turns into a full blown rehearsal, oh well nearly time for tea. Support band turn up, banter is exchanged which is “Hiya, Hiya”. Soundcheck over see of anyone else wants a haircut. Gary said no due to some infestation. Sit down to some vittles, oh bollocks forgot about the support band crew asking me to sort out their bass drum;. Better go. Ten minute job done, go and order my dinner, as usual in a very Germanic way, Zis Evenink I Vill be dining on ze Turkey unt Cranberry sauce, danke shörn. Caterers Susie and Susie, spent all afternoon preparing and cooking what they thought was Plaice when in fact it was Trout. Now don’t get me wrong but a plaice has it’s face on one side of it’s body and a Trout doesn’t, nuff said. Anyway, off to the dressing room for a game of TT and to chill out. Draw a Badly Drawn Boy for the Suns Badly Drawn Boy competition, where you simply have to draw Badly Drawn Boy. All three of us backline boys enter everyday. Today little Gor as we are in Glasgow is decked out in a kilt. 7.30 hours, I spent 15 minutes on the T shirt stand with a frothing pint of mentalness Cockney Jon and big Jon Burgess. You can’t beat a bit of shouting to get it out of the system, touring that is. Gig best yet, load out shit pissed it down again, spent it all in the back of the truck to keep dry. Had a shower, chilled out in the dressing room where Smiley and One legged Tim turned up (why he is called One Legged Tim, because his names Tim). I’d just like to say hello to Mr Strummer and the Mescaleros, respect. Back on bus, had phone call from home to say a pipe had burst, bugger. Chilled out Irie Ting laughed a lot,
Righteous D Hill, Drum Tech.
|
