Des Hill - Drum Tech
Badly Written Diary Ha Ha Ha Ha
10 am
Up after puking the contents of the Atlantic Ocean yesterday. I feel a lot better. Got off the bus. Yasser, our truck driver conveniently got said truck stuck in the mud right at the bottom of the load-in ramp. Didn't look at the stage - past caring. Had a wander around. Bumped into Gor, went to catering. Could eat a horse. Unfortunately horse is off the menu - Badly timed breakfast - so it's cornflakes and coffee. Have been here a couple of hours now and just realised we are all in the Republic of Yorkshire. This puts a slight grin on my face.
12 noonish
Gor and myself wander on to main stage to see who and what's going on. Chaos. Saw Mr. Grearly - good lad. Then Gor went to string 1,000 guitars. Meself and Beaver can't do nowt till 6 pm so off we go to check out what's going on elsewhere.
This festival is on a sight modeled on the Swiss Alps, so wherever you stand you won't be vertical. It's like getting your sea legs. Hung about for hours. Met a few mates and Ange the girl I am to marry in December in Bali. All the band and crew seemed very shocked when I told them this the previous evening, and all wanted to be bridesmaids. Went for dinner - Roast beef, Yorkshire pud, roast spuds, carrot and swede mash, cabbage, gravy and pudding - GREAT.
Hung around some more.
6 pm
All crew rendezvous at truck. PA, Happy Happy Joy Joy and his old mate Magic emptied their shit before I got up so on opening said truck just guitars in a rack, all shiny and restrung, and rest of back line. Gor's been busy. Quick look at stage - oh shit it's the size of a gnat's chuff. The ramps are like the north face of the Eiger, but the sun's out. OK set up in the truck - not too bad, apart from the slope. Obtain our first riser.
7.30 pm
Drums on. The stage manager seems confused and asks frantically looking at his stage plan "why are the drums on here?" "Oh" I said. "That's because I can." This confused him even more. Happy Happy Joy Joy explains what's going on to him but he still looks confused. Oh well what the F***. We know what we're doing.
9.40 pm
All set up, line checked and working. Push risers on stage. Line check for Front of House. Band on with time to spare. Gig great (NOTE: Punters got a bad deal - some got a bit flattened. Due to the Mean Fiddler promoters putting the tent on a f***ing hill - Tight C***s.
During the gig condensation poured from the roof onto the keys and drums. It looked like a chinese laundry back there - towels everywhere.
After a badly invited stage guest…..
11.10 gig over. Walked to back of the stage. Saw Yasser who looked like a drowned rat. I inquired if it was raining. Oh well, ask a daft question. Packed down and now the final push. Yasser has positioned the truck as close to the ramp as he could. Due to the mud we're 10 feet short - just like Steve McQueen's tunnel. Wearing my newly acquired inflatable pimp hat from Steve Lights (another good lad) keeping the big rain off we load the truck. PA first. The plan is to roll it all down the ramp as fast as possible and jump from the stage ramp 10 feet to the truck ramp. This proves difficult due to the equipment we carry all appears to be heavier than the universe. Mud, rain, sweat - is it all worth it? It must be. All done. Back on the bus, get bag, go to hospitality. Meet Ange, Carol, Julie and Joe. Got Gor a lift home - Ta Carol. Got one myself - Ta Julie.
All over.
A short message to the Mean Fiddler:- Next time don't think about your bank balance - think about the crews, drivers, punters. If you're going to lay metal roads make them go somewhere. Ramps should go to the floor not 8" off, and perhaps a bit of work-light. It makes me wonder where you got the tent from? Billy Smart's circus? Oh well if you need any tips next year get in touch we will put you straight For Nowt. |
